About.com helpfully rounds up the wisdom about couples therapy in Does Couples Counseling Work? and Benefits of Marriage Counseling.
There are people who stay in an unhappy marriage until the resentment builds and they feel they have no choice but to divorce. They don’t voice their unhappiness, they go with the flow hoping something will change and the problems will be instantly solved. Then there are those who “try” with everything they have to make the marriage work before they leave. These people are problem solvers who feel they owe it to the marriage to try to find solutions to the problems before they throw in the towel.
The one thing both have in common is that they rarely go to marriage counseling.
Looking for couples therapy in L.A.? Call or write to discuss what you’re going through and arrange an appointment: (323) 610-0112.
From WebMD: Is Your Marriage Toxic?
Give it time. Don’t expect the walls of resentment to come down right away. Rivkin suggests allowing at least three months to see if working with a therapist or using the advice from a relationship book is helping your marriage. Change may come slowly. But don’t be afraid of taking baby steps. “One little change can be huge to begin to change a pattern.”
Studies have couples checking in annually about their marriages, online.
“You don’t wait to see the dentist until something hurts — you go for checkups on a regular basis…If people were to bring their marriages in for a checkup on an annual basis, would that provide the same sort of benefit that a physical health checkup would provide?”
The origins of marriage counseling and other dirty laundry are aired in this New Yorker review of Rebecca L. Davis’ new book, More Perfect Unions: The American Search for Marital Bliss. Enjoy.