Will Baum, LCSW

Something to consider reading:  A Little Book on the Human Shadow, by Robert Bly.

You may know Bly as the author of men’s movement tome, Iron John.  He’s also a poet, public speaker, and engaged reader of lots of psych lit–particularly Carl Jung, Alice Miller, and Marie Louise von Franz.

Shadow reproduces a series of readings by and interviews with Bly, tied together with Jungian themes.  Who or what do you hate?  Take a careful look.  It may be that the qualities you despise most are the very qualities you were encouraged (or forced) to refuse yourself as you were growing up–irresponsibility, carelessness, greed, rage.

Bly encourages reconnecting with these despised traits–to honor the items stowed “in your bag.”  How?  Art, expression.  Especially helpful is an exploration of how these “shadow” dynamics play out in romantic relationships.  Not unlike the longer, less poetry-filled, more widely read Getting the Love You Want, by Harville Hendrix.  Take your pick.

To the Point joins the chatter re The Internet and the Human Brain–sparked in part by the publication of an apparently doom-heavy new book, The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to Our Brains.

Want to keep yourself thinking “long thoughts”?  Take weekends away from the web, suggests one panelist…if you can.

A review of The Invisible Gorilla: And Other Ways Our Intuitions Deceive Us. Here’s the test that gives the book its name (watch first, then read):

In U.S. News: A brief interview with author Ellen Galinsky.

Her new book, Mind in the Making: The Seven Essential Life Skills Every Child Needs, includes hundreds of simple ways that parents can use games and activities to promote the development of life skills in children.

What are the seven skills?  Here’s her list:

1. Focus and self-control
2. Perspective-taking
3. Communicating
4. Making connections
5. Critical thinking
6. Taking on challenges
7. Self-directed engaged learning

Yours may vary.

Gotten through The Mindbody Prescription and the other titles listed on this site’s pain page?  Here’s another to consider–some like it better than the rest:  Get Rid of the Pain in Your Butt Now! by Monte Hueftle.

Hueftle, a TMS Coach and Hypnotherapist, has also put together a full TMS course, The Master Practice, available through his website, RunningPain.com.  No word on that yet–let me know how it goes.

Couples’ lit spotlight: Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships, by sex/relationship therapist, David Schnarch. The book samples actual sex therapy sessions to make its case.

Don’t care to read 400 pages about how differentiation?  Try the six-point plan linked from Schnarch’s website, posted here minus the explanations:

1. Operate from the Best in Yourself.
2. Sustain eye contact with each other out of bed.
3. Try Hugging ’till Relaxed.
4. Make eye contact in bed.
5. Change your style of sexual interactions.
6. Pay attention to depth of involvement with your partner during sex.

Also via PassionateMarriage.com, here’s a Sex in Relationships Survey, which pretty much communicates what Schnarch is aiming at while rating your sex life on a 11 – 55 scale.

Here’s a quick interview with Dr. Vijay Vad, author of “Stop Pain.”  He suggests exercise for chronic pain.  Not quite on the stress illness bandwagon, but in its neighborhood:

I have seen a big explosion in chronic back pain and arthritis, and what I realized is that people have very limited self-help options. In the medical system, unfortunately, many health care providers do what they are trained to do. They push you into prescription medications which have side effects or suggest tons of medical procedures.

Sometimes chronic pain and illness, wrestled with over months and years, are finally found to be rooted in stress and tension.  For some, just considering that idea can help bring relief.

Here’s Dr. David Clarke’s list of common stress-related symptoms, taken from his book, They Can’t Find Anything Wrong!: 7 Keys to Understanding, Treating, and Healing Stress Illness.

• Pain such as headache, back pain, neck pain, chest pain, muscle or joint pain, and abdominal pain
• Abnormal swallowing, digestion, or bowel function including constipation, diarrhea, and bloating
• Nausea or vomiting
• Discomfort in the bladder or during urination.
• Respiratory symptom, including difficulty breathing and cough
• Voice changes
• Heart palpitations
• Pelvic and vaginal irritation, premensrual or menstrual pain
• Fatigue
• Abnormal sleeping or eating
• Symptoms related to nerve function such as blurred vision, dizziness, ringing in the ears, itching of the skin, sweating, numbness, or tingling

Sound like you?  As with any medical problem, the first step is to talk with your doctor.

For more on the topic try Dr. Clarke’s site, stressillness.com or Dr. David Schechter’s MindBodyMedicine.com.  On this site, go to  Stress-Related Pain and Illness.

A new Crisis Knocks piece, a one-question interview with mindfulness therapist and writer Elisha Goldstein, PhD, semi-coincides with the publication of A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook.  The workbook, excerpted here, has a great disc of mindfulness mp3s included–recommended.

A reader poll at Where the Client Is came up with the “best-ever therapy books” for therapists and for everyone.  Both list-toppers, I think, make good “everybody” titles.  They are:

Man’s Search for Meaning, by Victor Frankl

The Gift of Therapy, by Irvin Yalom

Both worth the time.