A review and excerpt of Tara Parker-Pope’s For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage, which surveys the research about what makes marriages work. From the book:
Is the story of your early courtship filled with nostalgia and optimism? Or is it tinged with negativity and regret? Do you remember getting lost in the rain together on your first date? Or do you just remember the fact that he refused to stop for directions?
Spouses who are in happy marriages often recount the early part of their relationship with laughter, smiles, and nostalgia — even when talking about difficult times like a job loss or financial struggles. Unhappy couples, however, tend to recast their past times together in a decidedly negative light.
Posted by Will Baum, LCSW